Lovely Renay from Mummy’s Miracles graciously accepted my invitation to do a guest post for Heart Mama. This is her heart story. It gave me goosebumps. I hope you enjoy it.

Hands

I still remember to this day, the moment, the second that we decided to have a baby.

We were on a week long summer holiday in Egypt. My husband was coming down with a nasty illness from eating something he probably shouldn’t have had and we were sitting in a mini bus, heading back to our resort. It was terribly hot and out of the blue said to me, “So, when we get home, maybe we should start thinking about having a baby”.

I wondered if it was because he was unwell. But no, after we returned home, he still hadn’t changed his mind.

It took 11 months and two miscarriages before I fell pregnant with my now 4-year-old daughter.

I can’t say the pregnancy was joyous; more fraught with fear and worry. But then she arrived. My beautiful blue-eyed girl, wrapped in towels was handed to me and she was perfect.

I just lay there staring at her, trying to still convince myself that she was mine. She didn’t cry, she just gazed back.

Love at first sight.

I hadn’t had a chance to think about what sort of parent I would be during my pregnancy. And now all of a sudden, I had a baby. But we all figured it out together. I didn’t read books or manuals. I just went with what worked for us.

I can’t say that night times are always easy in this house. Both my girls are co-sleepers. But that is what works here.

For me there is nothing better than the time I get to spend with my big girl at night. Quiet time where we read books and sing songs. And once she falls asleep, I can’t help but stay in her room with her for a little while longer. Watching her sleep. Making sure her hair isn’t in her eyes and marvelling at how soft her skin is. Praying that I don’t make too many mistakes on my parenting journey and hoping that she grows up thinking that I did a good job of it.

She will be the first of my children to experience all of life’s ups and downs. The one that bore the brunt of my inexperience. But as we grow together, one of my most treasured gifts is the friendship we are now creating. I love it when she tells me that I’m her best friend. It makes me realise that in her eyes, what I do is right. Even if we have to have cross words, we are still friends. When we are all tired and grumpy, we are still friends. When I have to take the old band-aid off and put a clean one on, we are still friends.

And in my heart, that is how I hope it stays forever.

Mummy’s Miracles x

Renay

 

 

 

 

 

Join Renay at Mummy’s Miracles on Facebook, and read more from her blog here.

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{Linking with Jess for IBOT at Essentially Jess.}